Crazy Stupid Love
by WGDWriter
Summary: France and England have been dating for a year and are living together. But when France screws up and England is all alone, will America be the hero or will France earn back the Brit's heart? FrUK vs. USUK fic.
1. Chapter 1

England watched as France talked to the waitress of the restaurant he insisted on taking him to. France had been… England sighed. He didn't even know what sort of mood France was in at the moment. France seemed to be interested in everything…except him. They had been going out for almost a year now and it had been one of the happiest years of England's life. But now that England went and moved in with France, the Frenchman had become distant. He wasn't around anymore and he worked long and unusual hours now. This was the first time in three months that England had seen France, and England felt like a third wheel already. France was only paying attention to their waitress rather than him.

"Oh really?" France raised one of his eyebrows and the waitress giggled, "Well then. Maybe you need some company?"

England cleared his voice and the waitress immediately looked at him, "Sir, do you need a refill?"

"Yes, that would be helpful." England cleared his voice again and the waitress went and took his glass.

As the waitress left, France's eyes followed her and he gave her a look that made England's face turn red. He lightly kicked his lover's shine, which caused France to knee the table. France yelped in pain, which caused several eyes to look his way.

England quickly put on a look of concern and leaned forward making his hand brush up against France's, "Are you alright?"

"Y-Yeah." France winced, "I'm fine." When everyone else went back to their own business, France shot England an angry glance and hissed, "What did you do that for?"

"Do what?" England whispered quietly and gave France a look of innocence.

"Never mind." France took a sip of his wine and closed his eyes, "So how was your day? Did anything interesting happen?"

"Oh, nothing new." England shrugged and then laughed lightly, "You know, I haven't seen you in a while."

"My boss has been piling work on me. I was lucky enough to even have time to go out today."

"Oh?" England saw France's eyes didn't have their usual lively light in them, "So you need a break?" France sighed and gave a faint nod as he sipped his wine. England smiled and put his hand on France's who took hold of it and drew small circles on it with his thumb. "Maybe we should go home then?" England smiled and leaned in slightly, "I can give you a massage and we could have a little alone time."

France's thumb froze in mid-circle and he looked back at his lover who had a glint that France usually wore. France chuckled, the light returning to his eyes, "Is that what you have in mind?" France asked with a knowing smile.

"Hm…" England sighed and winked at France, "I don't know. Why don't we go home so you could find out?"

"I have your tea sir." The waitress had returned which caused France to drop England's hand, "I hope you didn't have to wait long."

"Oh, no I didn't. Thank you. Can you also-"

"I also took the liberty of writing this down for you sir." the waitress smiled at France and gave him a folded scrap of paper, "I hope you use it soon."

France opened up the folded paper and with the light hitting it perfectly; England was able to see numbers. France gave the waitress a mischievous look, "Ohnononon. I'll be sure to use this well."

The waitress blushed a brilliant shade of red before she stuttered, "I-I"

"May we please have our check?" England asked as politely as he could.

"We just got here Arthur." France used his human name as he winked at the waitress, "Why the rush?"

"I-I thought you wanted to go home before you went back to work."

France wasn't even listening. He had taken hold of the waitress's hand and he was caressing it with his other hand that seemed to be slowly making its way to the young lady's back. England was taken aback by France's behavior. He seemed frozen in place; unable to take his eyes away as France lightly kissed the waitress's hand softly, making her blush and smile. England stood up quickly, disturbing his table and knocking down his seat. Everyone's eyes were on him, even the waitress and France noticed. England was shaking with anger; he couldn't hold it in anymore.

"What do you think you're doing you bloody frog!"

"Arthur, calm down." France stepped away from the waitress and moved his hand to his lovers shoulder.

"No, you calm down Francis!" England shouted pushing France's hand away, "You need to dial down on your perverted fantasies and open your eyes to what you have for once in your life. I don't know why I didn't see this coming before."

"Arthur!" France grabbed England's hand before he had the chance to get away, "Please let me explain."

"Explain what Francis? There is nothing for you to say. You were flirting with someone else in front of me. How do you expect me to overlook that?" England yanked his hand away and took several steps back to gain some distance, "We're through. I have nothing else to say to you."

* * *

A/N: And here is one of the actual fics I promised you. I'm thinking Iggy spent a little too much time with France there. XDD But I do feel sorry for him. I think I know where to go from here. But suggestions I will take. You guys are the ones who read this and I get inspiration from you all.


	2. Chapter 2

England rushed out of the restaurant just as his vision began to blur. Together for a year and France was already beginning to push the Brit away. The Frenchman ran after England and abruptly turned him around. France seemed startled to see the tears escape his lover's closed eyes and even more surprised when England pushed him away forcefully.

"Stay away from me Frog!" England shouted.

"England, please!" France begged, "Let me explain. I deserve that much, do I not?"

"No, you don't." England yelled, "I saw what was going on. You had it going with that bloody waitress like you were only out with your bloody friends! I don't even know you any more…"

"England!" France took the Brit's hand. England tugged weakly at it and failed to get away from the other's grasp. The Frenchman gave England a genuine sad look that held love and an apology, "I did that out of old habit Mon amour. It has been three months since I have had a chance to go out. I was stupid and flirted with her, yes. I admit my fault, but I swear nothing was going on."

England was quiet as he looked at France. The apology seemed genuine and heartfelt, but… "How can I trust you, knowing you can just as easily be flirting with someone else when I'm not around?"

"M-Mon amour…" France's eyes were wide with surprise and sadness, "I wouldn't do that to you. Please…forgive me." The Frenchman's eyes brightened up suddenly, "Wait, I have an idea! I'll prove myself to you. Let's go home, and I'll give you the night of your life." France wrapped his arms around the British man and gave him a loving smile. "What do you say?"

England blushed, "I-I…" He looked up into France's eyes, which held hope in them. The Brit could tell that the Frenchman wanted to make things right again. England wanted things to be right again. He wanted that more than anything France can offer. The British man sighed and pushed away from France, whose arms fell limply and had a hurt look to his face. "I need some time to think…"

"O-Of course Mon amour." France gave him a small fragile smile, "I-I'll…I'll be at home when you decide."

England only nodded with no other type of response. France stood there like his feet were anchored to the spot. He seemed to be in a daze as he looked at England who avoided eye contact and hugged himself in a protective embrace. The Frenchman wanted more than anything to pull the Brit into his arms and tell him everything was going to be okay. But he knew if he did that, the words wouldn't reach his lover's ears, and England would possibly cringe away from his touch. With a heavy heart, France walked back to his home and his legs felt as though they were made of bricks. The Frenchman was going to have a long wait.

England watched as France walked away. Tears came to his eyes as he turned and walked in the opposite direction. He didn't have much to do but think. _Should I go and forgive him?_ That question bounced around in his head along with memories of the glorious year spent with France. They had both went and made sure to make their relationship work. This incident…it was their first lovers quarrel. England sat down at a table outside a café, and ordered tea. He then quickly changed his order and asked for ale, any sort of alcohol! He didn't care what, he just needed a drink. Once the drink was delivered to him, England stared down at the drink and swirled the liquid in the glass. Yes, he wanted to drink all his problems away, but something was holding him back. He just didn't know what.

"Dude!" a hand slapped his back, causing England to jump and nearly spill his drink, "I have been calling you. Didn't you hear me?"

England looked over his shoulder and saw America, "Go away you bloody wanker!"

America smiled, "Aw come on Arthur, I'm not even teasing you and you're trying to scare me away? What sort of gentleman are you?"

England frowned and looked back at his drink and continued to swirl it in silence. America took a seat across the nation, still smiling. America seemed to think the Brit was just ignoring him as usual. "So Iggy, I have been wondering when you were going to be coming out for fresh air. I haven't seen you in like a century!"

"Three months…" England muttered bitterly more to himself than to America.

"Whatever dude!" America laughed, "It feels like a century. I have been asking everyone about you since you have been cooped up all day inside. I even went as far as to find France since you two are living together."

At the mention of France, England moaned pitifully and put his head down onto the table. Tears stung his eyes yet again, and they weren't visible to the laughing American. America poked the British man's head again and again like a child who wanted attention. "Dude, don't tell me your drunk!"

"I'm not drunk you fat ass!" England's head snapped up when he shouted, revealing the tears he was trying to hide.

America saw the tears and became confused, "Dude…it was a joke. You don't need to cry about it."

"I'm not crying because of your bloody, stupid, humorless jokes!" England wiped away the tears, "I'm not even crying…dust flew in my eye is all…"

"Arthur." America's face became serious, "That's a sorry ass excuse and we both know it. Tell me what happened."

"It's none of your business." England sniffed and glared at the American, "And why should I tell you? It's not like you care or anything!"

"I'm asking you about it. Doesn't that show I care?"

England was stunned into silence. He looked back at his drink, swirling it around with a pained look that managed to look thoughtful. "…It's all that damn bloody frog's fault." he muttered.

"Frenchy?" America asked, "What did he do to get you upset?"

"We went out to a restaurant." England said with a sad voice, "I hadn't seen him in three months because work kept him late and made him wake early…I thought it would be nice to take him out. The first thing he does is order food…and flirts with our waitress. He didn't even notice me until I got her to leave…"

"No more!" America stood up. His face showed anger and determination, "As the Hero, I will fix this for you. Just tell me where he is and I'll kick his ass in."

The Brit looked up at America with surprise and seemed touched at the same time, "No, no, it's fine."

"You sure? I will do it. Just tell me and I will."

England smiled with a light pitiful chuckle, "I'm sure…I just have to decide whether or not to forgive him for what he did."

"This is your first fight…isn't it?" America seemed genuinely interested and concerned, "If it is, I think you should forgive him, but punish him at the same time."

"How the hell am I supposed to do that?" England asked, slightly curious.

America smiled, "Follow me and I'll show you." The American walked away from the café leaving England to watch with surprise. America looked behind him and waved at him, "Come on Iggy! Do you want to do this or what?"

"Don't call me that!" The British man shouted.

"Well come on!" the American gestured wildly, "Let's get this show on the road!"

England looked at his drink once more before shaking his head and leaving it untouched, "This had better be worth my time."

* * *

A/N: I had this done for a while, but I like to reread these chapters over and over again, leave it, and then come back to it to see if there are any mistakes or if there is anything else I want to add. Well now that I'm finally happy with this, I have a question for you all. What do you think America is planning? Just how can France be forgiven and punished at the same time? I have an idea, but I want to see what you all think.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Sorry everyone about the long break. School has went and taken up most of my time and since I'm in college, I have really weird times as to when I start school. Plus I'm job searching so that takes up some of my writing time. I promise I'll get to updating my other stories soon. I just wanted to get this down for you all so you had at least something to read.

* * *

"Alfred!" England exclaimed as he followed after America impatiently. The American was just walking forward with his stupid grin, not even paying attention to the Brit. "Alfred!" he practically shouted and eyes landed on England and America, "You bloody wanker! Where are we going? You said something about forgiving and punishing that bloody frog at the same time. How are we supposed to do that?!"

America only laughed in response, causing the Englishman to become irritated. He had been following the laughing fool for almost ten minutes now. At first England was genuinely curious in what America had planned. Even though the American's ideas usually were exaggerated and out of reach, any idea in making France pay for what he did sparked something inside the Brit. He hadn't thought of getting revenge for a full year and three months. He was itching to get a taste of something he hadn't touched in so long, and he was willing to let an idiot help him.

But so far…nothing. Not a single word about the plan. America had only laughed. Laughed! At what? England didn't even know, but he was getting tired of walking and hearing the American's dumb laughter. If America was just wasting his time, he wasn't the mood. Or didn't the stupid git not see England was upset? American's…they could look like the most caring people one moment and then the next…BAM! You realize you had fallen into their trap and it's too late. They used you for their own amusement.

"You know what Alfred." England did his best to control his voice, but it was clear that he was annoyed and ready to blow, "I have been through a lot today. The only reason I have been following you is because you said you would help me. I see know that you see this as a bloody joke!" America stopped and turned with a surprised look, but England continued, "I could have been enjoying my drink and have found an answer to the one question I need to answer instead of prancing around on the sidewalk trying to find a way to Candyland!"

"Arthur, dude." America laughed, "Chill out okay? I thought you knew what I was trying to get at this whole time."

"What were you trying to get at?!"

"I'm not telling you." America laughed, "Since you don't know, I'll keep it a secret until you guess what we are doing."

"Wasting time?!" England exclaimed, "You know what you bloody git, I'm leaving."

"Iggy! Don't-"

"Don't call me that!" England shouted, "I have just one question for you whenever you call me that: Who the fuck is Iggy?! That's not even my name!"

"Dude, you're not even drunk and you're cursing already." America muttered, "All you had to say was you didn't want to be called Iggy." the American seemed sad at first, but he soon smiled again, "Now cool your jets and let's go!"

"Go where?!" England crossed his arms, "Do you even know where you're going?"

"Nope." America laughed, "But it doesn't matter. As long as it keeps the plan in motion, I'll figure out a place to go."

The Englishman smacked his hand to his forehead. Why did he put up with the American all the time? "And what exactly is the plan?" he inquired again.

"You'll see." the American smiled, "I promise you. This plan is fool proof. Frenchy won't know what hit him."

England sighed irritated, but followed America. They did some more walking before a sound reached the Brit's ears. America laughed and put a hand on his stomach, patting it with a smile. "Looks like I figured out where we're going~" the American laughed and ran forwards, "Come on Arthur! We have to find some food!"

"W-Wait! America!" England cried and ran after America, shouting out his nation name without regards to the other people around him.

People stared at them as the two of them ran, giving them strange looks before continuing on their way. It was a strange sight, seeing two grown men running, especially since one was laughing like a maniac and the other looked ready to rip the other man's head off. England was surprised at how fast America was able to run, despite the American eating so much unhealthy food and drinking so much soda with artificial ingredients. He consumed so many unhealthy things, yet America's body acted like it was as healthy as a horse. How was that possible? America let out a cry of joy and sped up. When England caught sight of what America was after, he forced himself to suppress an irritated groan. _Damn golden arches are everywhere are they?_ The Brit thought as America rushed inside his favorite establishment.

"Come on Arthur!" America cried with excitement, "Lunch is on me!"

"Stupid American git." England muttered in response and followed him inside. When was the idiot going to eat better?

The Brit looked around at the interior of the one place he didn't want to be. He had only been inside McDonalds only a few times, but he didn't quite remember the establishment looking so…refined? No…that wasn't the word England was looking for. He actually couldn't find any words to describe what he was seeing. The one place he expected to see benches and rounded tables that were famous in fast food restaurants weren't in sight. Instead, England found himself looking at what looked like a decent restaurant.

"When in the world did this place change their décor?" he asked himself.

"Arthur!" America waved at the Brit from a table, already chomping down on a burger.

England sighed and sat down beside him with an irritated look. Once he was seated, the American pushed a bag forward and a cup that contained some sort of soda. The Brit grimaced at the food that was offered to him. Sure, he had McDonalds with America before and he secretly thought it tasted good. But the food was absolutely bad for one's health. America ate more than what was possible and he had weight problems no doubt. England refused to eat the food offered because of that one reason.

"Come on dude, eat up." America laughed, "You're going to be sorry later if you don't eat now."

"You're insane if you think I'm going to eat this now." England muttered.

The American sighed. "Fine, you want a salad instead?" he asked, "Though, if you want to go by the healthiest, I heard the fries are healthier. But that's just what one dude said. I don't see what the problem is with everyone saying this is bad."

England grimaced as America continued eating the food. "It's fatty Alfred. And if you keep eating it, you are going to have problems in the future."

"What problems?" he laughed and the Brit only rolled his eyes.

America finished eating his food and urged England to at least eat something before they left. The Brit just went and nibbled and munched on a few things before the American gave up, throwing the food away. As they walked out of America's favorite establishment, they continued walking until they passed by a café in which America ran right in. England frowned and muttered something about America's appetite just as the American returned with a biscuit and a cup with some tea.

"Now eat." America smiled, "We're going to be walking about for a while so you might as well have something to eat before you lose your strength."

England seemed touched that America would actually go and buy something for him to eat without really getting something for himself. He mumbled a thank you and ate what was offered to him as they wandered about. As they walked, America would talk about random things that came from the top of his head. England listened partially, tuning the other out from time to time as he tried to guess what America's plan was. The American wasn't even letting out a single clue as he blabbered away, and England again began to wonder if it was a good idea in letting an idiot help him plot revenge.

"Hey." America's eyes flashed with concern as he shook the other lightly, "What's on your mind? You look like your spacing out on me dude."

England was surprised America noticed. He never really tried to sense the atmosphere before, yet here the American git was! "Nothing really…"

"Come one dude." The American smiled, "Just relax. I promise you that this is working out better than you expect. Frenchy won't know what hit him because it seems that even you wouldn't have thought of this plan if you don't even realize you're already doing it."

"Doing what Alfred?" England asked, "We aren't doing anything other than walking around. I'm starting to think you don't have a plan in that idiotic head of yours."

America laughed. "Seriously dude! You don't even realize what's going on, don't you? Check the time!"

England looked down at his watch and blinked in confusion. Not too long ago it was noon…or so he thought. Looking at his clock, the Brit saw it was almost 5:30. As he stared at his watch dumbly, America was laughing and had to hold onto something to keep him from falling over.

"Arthur, dude!" he laughed, "Your face is priceless. I can only imagine what Francis's face is going to look like."

"What the hell you bloody git!" England exploded, "You made me waste several hours when I could have thought of an answer to my question! I could have enjoyed my drink! I could-"

"Calm down Artie." America laughed, "You really need to think about this in a different perspective."

"What are you talking about?" England asked with irritation.

"You want to forgive Francis, but also punish him at the same time." America explained, "Do you forgive him for that slip up at the restaurant?" England was silent for a moment before nodding. "Good! Now, while you were walking around with me, what do you think Frenchy was up to? Is he sipping wine and watching one of his boring old movies…or is he pacing around, wondering where you are and looking out the window to see if he sees you?"

England looked at America dumbly. "You…were wasting time…to get the bloody frog worried." he said in realization.

"Exactly!" the American smiled, "Now that you know the plan, do you want to go home, or make Frenchy suffer for a little bit longer?"

* * *

A/N: For those of you who don't know, McDonald's is changing their interior to look more welcoming and less like a fast food restaurant. I've seen some pictures and they actually don't look like a fast food restaurant anymore. But I live near a McDonald's that doesn't look like that...so who knows if they'll updating the interior.

And we have a smart American people! He's not dumb all the time, even if he acts like it. He's just hiding his smartness so he can go and surprise you all with his knowledgeable brain of his. XD Anyways I'll try to update soon and I'll leave you all with a cliff hanger~


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